Pick the Perfect Spot
The
location of your wedding determines not only the mood (rustic,
sophisticated, beachy), but also the travel, time and budget required to
pull it off. You want your guests to walk away from your wedding
weekend saying, "That was so them!" Your wedding elements -- not just
location, but also activities and overall vibe -- should say something
about your personal style and your passions. Did he propose on vacation
in Paris? Then why not host a swank wedding in the City of Lights? Are
you foodies? Think about gathering your crew in a place like Tuscany or
California wine country. Or if you love outdoor adventures, consider
Costa Rica, where guests can zipline through the treetops before the
rehearsal dinner.
Time It Right
Unfortunately,
the best weather in popular vacation destinations tends to correlate
with tourist season, when there are typically more crowds, fewer hotel
and venue availabilities, and higher rates all around. If you choose to
marry during high season, you’ll want to reserve hotel blocks and venues
immediately and send out save-the-dates 10 to 12 months in advance so
guests can book their flights and accommodations before prices
skyrocket. If you choose the shoulder season (right after high season),
you may be able to save yourself and your guests some money and still
enjoy great weather. While the off-season will mean fewer crowds, the
weather can be iffy, and you may find that many stores, venues and
vendors close up shop.
Take a Trip
We
seriously can’t recommend this enough: Take at least one planning trip
and if you can swing it, two or three is ideal. On the first trip,
you'll need to scout and secure your key venues -- ceremony and
reception spaces, hotels for guests, a rehearsal dinner venue -- and
local suppliers such as caterers, florists and photographers. Next (or
during a second trip), you'll need to schedule "tastings" with your
caterer, see sample bouquets from the florist, plan a hair and makeup
session with a local salon and organize activities (golf, tennis,
walking tours, museums) for your guests.
Factor in the Extra Expenses
If
done right, a destination wedding can cost no more -- and maybe even
less -- than hosting the same party at home (depending on where you
live, of course). For example, if you live in a US metropolitan city
where event facilities are in high demand, like New York City, then
holding your wedding in Mexico will likely be less expensive than doing
it at home, even when you factor in airfare, hotel expenses and planning
trips. Still there are extra expenses you’ll need to factor in for any
destination wedding, including importing key vendors and décor, welcome
bags for guests, additional activities for guests and travel costs for
you and your immediate families (including the planning trips, not just
the big day).
Research Local Marriage Requirements
The
legal side of tying the knot in a different country can be complicated.
Many countries have a "residency requirement" (for example, 24 hours in
Turks and Caicos and 7 days in England), which means you must reside in
the country for a certain length of time before your ceremony. Although
this is usually just a few days, it can be longer. France requires you
to arrive at least 40 days before you marry!
Get Help
Control
freaks, beware: If you’re hosting a wedding in a distant locale, you
will need to entrust at least part of the planning to someone else’s
capable hands. A wedding planner can shoulder the burden of researching
and securing local vendors (especially valuable if said vendors speak
English only as a second language), dealing with logistics like tent
rentals and lighting and handling any last-minute fires that may start
in the weeks leading up to the wedding. She is also the
behind-the-scenes queen, creating gift bags for guests, greeting
everyone at the airport, keeping people busy with fun activities once
there, vetting special requests (babysitters, dry cleaners, and so on),
and getting everyone where they need to be on-time. Many resorts include
a coordinator in their wedding packages. Otherwise, set aside about 10
to 15 percent of your total budget for a local planner. Generally
speaking, a local planner is your best bet, as he can be your
man-on-the-ground when you can't be there. But if you prefer to go with a
planner from back home, make sure they have experience planning
weddings in your chosen destination and expect to cover his
transportation costs for planning visits and the actual wedding.
Remember: You're on Island Time
Don't
keep a constant eye on the clock. Remember that many tropical islands
run on "island time" -- things happen when they happen -- so don't
mistake a vendor's laid-back attitude for incompetence. Avoid the
temptation to micromanage from afar. Schedule regular check-ins and then
trust your vendors to work their magic.
Vet Vendors Carefully
While
you can view vendors' portfolios online and check references from afar,
it's especially important that you're comfortable with all your
vendors. You'll be leaving a lot in their hands, as you won't be able to
be nearly as hands-on, so it's important you trust those hands are
capable. That's why we strongly suggest making at least one planning
trip to meet with potential vendors. If you must hire your vendors
unseen, schedule a video chat so you can get a sense for a potential
vendor's demeanor and personality before you sign a contract. Your
wedding planner can meet with potential vendors on your behalf and brief
you on your options, as well. Another option: Bring pros you trust from
home to handle critical aspects such as the wedding photography, hair
and makeup, and design (lighting, flowers), and even work with local
vendors in a supervisory capacity to avoid any communication mishaps.
Just remember: You’ll have to cover their travel and lodging expenses.
Forewarn Your Friends
Tell your bridal party about the destination
before
you ask them to stand by your side so that they can gracefully decline
if finances are tight. Don't be upset if some of your closest friends or
relatives don't attend. While you are, in a sense, footing some of the
food bills, their fees for travel, hotel, and car rental can really add
up. And while your wedding is a mini-vacation for you, it may not be the
one
they want to take!
Mind Mother Nature
Don’t
just assume that the weather in the Caribbean, Hawaii and Mexico is
gorgeous year-round. Hurricane season lasts from July through October in
the Caribbean and can put a major damper on your nuptials, while rainy
season makes marrying in Hawaii dicey from November to March, and Italy
can be uncomfortably hot in July and August.
Take Care of Guests
In
addition to arranging group rates for flights and rooms, list
information for getting to and from the nearest airport to your wedding
locale, invite everyone to the rehearsal or welcome dinner and next-day
brunch, and deliver welcome bags to their rooms, full of essentials for
the trip, like suntan lotion, water and bug spray.
Dress the Part
Don't forget to consider the climate when choosing your wedding dress
-- and deciding on everyone else's attire. You'll be swimming in sweat
if you pair your fairy-tale satin ball gown with tropical humidity, and
asking your groomsmen to wear tuxes in the sun and heat is just cruel.
Also, if you're exchanging vows outside, you may want to reconsider a
long train that will easily get muddy or grass-stained or three-inch
heels that will stick in the mud.
Get a Move On It Already!
Not
to stress you out, but you're basically competing in the Olympics of
wedding planning -- the long-distance affair. You need to be twice as
organized as a local couple and pre-think everything, because you won’t
have much time to make up your mind, especially if you can only do one
or two planning trips. Every trip should be one fat to-do list of
appointments with vendors, coordinators and venue managers, so do your
research, set up appointments and form a clear vision of what you want
before you go. The good news: If you give yourselves one weekend to find
a reception site, you'll find one. In other words, distance will make
you decisive, which will make the whole planning process a lot less
stressful.
-- The Knot
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